emotions

Day 2 of Letrozole and the side effect list is growing!

-headaches
-nausea
-dizziness
-hot flushes 

 It's miserable!! The worst for me is feeling nauseous. I hate being sick or feeling sick.

Plus I think the crazy mood swings are making an appearance too. I have been feeling extremely emotional today, which wasn't helped by SIL posting her 3D scan pics up on Facebook....

I think for a long while there I didn't actually believe she was pregnant. Infact (due to her past history) I thought it was all a big story, and she would eventually tell everyone she had miscarried. But I was wrong...she will have a baby in her arms by Christmas. 

I won't. 

There is not even a guarantee that I will be pregnant by Christmas. Infact, we might be preparing to start our first IVF cycle in January after 3 failed IUI cycles. 


Yes-I am getting somewhat ahead of myself.
Yes-we may get lucky before it comes to IVF.


BUT...

I have to prepare myself for worst case scenarios. I can't carry on all light hearted and sunshine. I am trying to take it one cycle at a time..but my brain likes to think 12 steps in front...which means thinking about SIL and how I will manage if we are no closer to a baby once she has given birth to hers. 

One day my brain is going to explode from all this over thinking...