Another Whinge

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Just going to have a whinge...

Was up early to go get my blood test done. No bruise on my arm so far, but it's really sore! I do however have a big bruise on my belly from one of my injections last night. The only other bruise I have had has been very small so not sure how this has happened! Still extremely bloated and uncomfortable. Having lots of throbbing pains from my ovaries too. I suppose these are good signs.

I have been feeling nauseous ALL day. I took one of my Metformin pills with morning tea and felt so sick ever since. You would think my body would be used to this medication by now, but obviously not. -sigh-

Hormones are full on. I am alternating between crying my eyes out and extreme rage. Poor DH keeps copping the rage when he calls. I seem to end up snapping at him over nothing. I apologise and he does realise that the drugs are having a massive effect on me (figured that when he was experiencing the mood swings face to face before he went back to work) but I still feel so awful. I just can't seem to control my emotions at the moment. I am more sensitive to EVERYTHING. Little things seems to piss me off or make me want to cry. Just thinking about DH and how much he is putting up with is now making me teary.

I don't think I expected to be feeling so 'not like me' at this point in the IVF cycle. I didn't think the side effects would be any worse than Letrozole, but I was wrong. I feel like I'm falling apart emotionally, and I know that this is only going to get worse over the next few weeks until we know the outcome. Physically, I just don't feel right. I would love a few side effect free days so I could feel healthy and normal. Not likely to happen anytime soon...although if I fall pregnant I am hoping I might get to stop the Metformin! That would be a relief. I know none of this is permanent, but I have been on some form of medication or the other for many months now. The injections are certainly more intense, but Letrozole and Metformin are not exactly a walk in the park either. At lest with the Letrozole it was over in 6 or 7 days...

I am still quite scared that when I go to my scan on Monday I am going to be told that my follies are not growing...I'm not sure what happens from there. Like whether the cycle is cancelled or whether they give me some bigger doses of the drugs...I would hope they could just give me some more drugs and postpone EPU rather than cancelling all together. That would be less upsetting.

I don't think the weather is helping my mood either. It's wet and miserable and I can't remember when I last saw some sunshine. I am in desperate need of a few hours sitting in the sand and soaking up some rays. It's Summer after all...but totally not feeling like it here!